Monday, January 26, 2009

To Die or Not To Die?

Yesterday, I, along with my extended family (that is to say uncles, aunties and cousins - none removed lol), went to Sungai Sendat, Ulu Yam. We always have outings together as a whole family. Usually only within Malaysia, but the farthest being Indonesia.

So I woke up around 8.15AM to prepare the food. My Mom said we were to depart at 9AM. Still, we took our sweetest time doing anything but preparing ourselves. I was busy preparing the food, of course, but not bothering to rush a bit. Everyone else was busy doing something else. My younger brother was still asleep, even. My relatives had, needless to say, set out at around 9AM. Whilst my family were starting on the freeway at about 10.15AM.

The reception deep within the jungle was of course, poor. We had difficulties contacting our relatives to reach the river. We eventually made it, though, naturally. 

My little cousins were already soaked wet in the river. My uncles were starting to perch a small tent on a cement square. I suppose it was still early, for there were not many tourists yet, but enough to occupy all the limited gazebos. 

I changed my outfit and hesitantly dipped myself in the ice-cold water. I'm telling you, it was freakishly COLD. But that degree of coldness is only on the 4th tier of the many-tiers river! You wait.

So first, we swam around this so-called 4th tier of the river. Wait, actually, I dipped myself in the 4.5th tier hehe. This is kind of like the middle or the rocks within the 4.5th tier.





Then i progressed further to the 4th tier hehe. The depth was pretty shallow but it got deeper near the waterfall.



It was really nice. I swam and played around with my cousins. However, something bothered me a bit. There was this small group of youngsters (not to say that I'm old) who were about 15-17 years old, who were there as friends/couples. I'm not so sure. Whatever. My point being that, even if you are to go there with your lover (I'm referring to girls for now), do you have to be so shallow as to wear white shirt to the point that people can see your stunning nipples? Really. Wish I could inject some rationality into that girl's brain. Oh well. As long as she's content.
So you see the waterfall there? There were a bunch boys who slid down the waterfall, at first. I thought it was spooky. Still think it is actually. But at the end of the day, I slid down the waterfall, too! TWICE! My two girl-cousins and I! People were respecting us, naturally haha.



That is obviously me *rawr*. I know I looked stiff, hell it was scary! With that many spectators up there, PLUS DOWN THERE, I shudder to think what could have happened. Here's my cousin's friend who did the "stunt", too. Our stimulator, actually. His picture is a bit clearer because he did it first and my aunt managed to snap his picture using the digital camera! By the time it was my turn, it took me like 15 minutes to decide whether or not to slide. Eventually, the battery died and my aunt took mine using the phone camera.


He is one crazy fella. Doing it the Superman style. 

So this is where my first point comes in. Seeing other people doing it made it look fun. And safe. But still spooky in certain ways. I so wanted to do it that I couldn't think properly. It made me indecisive. It looked safe, so I told my cousins, let's do it! So we climbed up to advance to the 3rd tier. My younger cousin went first. It took her only like 5 minutes to decide. She was fine. When it was my turn, I thought of doubling back. I sat there, thinking. While the people around me threatened to push me if I even thought of backing out. I was like, oh what the hell. The current will push me. Halfway down the slide, I will be pushed forward at the concave. I SHOULD be safe. After my cousin's friend gave me tips on how to do it, I finally decided YES.
So I prayed to God to let me still live because I still need to seek repentance for my sins, and pushed myself forward. With the adrenaline rush, I couldn't remember what happened along the way. What I know is, my head almost hit the rocks when I've splashed into the water. I suppose my position was wrong. But I was glad I was alive! It was scary because I know I barely escaped unscathed. And I did it again. Another near-death experience. I swear, for that second time, if I was not careful, I could have broken my backbone.

Before all that, we advanced up the 2nd tier. Sorry I don't have pictures for this. Earlier we didn't think of bringing the camera along. And mind you, hiking up the slope was onerous. So, at the 2nd tier, the water was the ICIEST-COLDEST. At the waterfall towards the 3rd tier, there was this log. This log jutted out the waterfall, in which you can jump from the edge of the log into the 3rd tier. This waterfall you can't slide because it was too steep. So the guys there jumped from the log. This looked much harmless compared to sliding the 3rd tier waterfall. That's why we decided to "perform" this stunt, without thinking twice. 

However, once we've reached the edge of the log, we didn't just think twice, we thought a trillion times! This was harder than we anticipated. Of course there were many spectators. The whole time we were there, I was mostly with my two cousins, Nurul (17) and Kak Rina (24). During the early days, my family lacked female offsprings. So anyway, we kept changing turns. We were all SO SCARED to jump down the log. I was lucky to be the one in the middle. They kept arguing about, the oldest should go first. No, the youngest should go first. Ditto. Ditto.
In the end the age didn't matter. Still, we kept changing turns. Nurul went first bravely to the edge of the log. Scared. I volunteered. Scared. Kak Rina volunteered. Scared. Nurul volunteered. The same thing over and over again for literally about 30 minutes! Eventually, Nurul went first. She was fine, OF COURSE!
I went next. It took me awhile and this time, the ranking took place between me and Kak Rina. I was tired of waiting, I decided, Hell, I'll just go. And I did.

This is where my second point comes in. The moment I jumped, I immediately thought, "Oh fuck, what have I done?!?!". I swear, right after my feet left the log, my surrounding was EMPTY. I understood, then and there, that people who've committed suicide by jumping off buildings or any high places for that matter, didn't regret the decision when they're almost crashing on the ground, but the moment they felt nothing beneath their feet. It made me not ever want to, in any circumstances, commit suicide by jumping.
This, I did not attempt twice. Kak Rina, however, didn't attempt it at all! HAH! But, you know, this one was fairly safe. Compared to the waterfall-sliding, I think this decision was harder to make, though, because you yourself need to decide WHEN to jump, whereas for the sliding, the current pushes you, plus you can't see where you're going to fall. Jumping off the log, you see the bottom, and you're not confident if you're going to suddenly be light as a feather and hit the stone-wall.

My advice to you peasants seeking adventures out there, you ought to try these kind of things, provided someone else has done it before you! Haha. Really, I could still feel the adrenaline rush even before I went to bed that night.

So, to get back our blood in the right places, here's a picture of the old kinsfolk who could only dip their feet in the river for fear of the cold. They took care of the babies and food at our "camping site" like the makcik-makcik yang kuih tak laku. Hehehe... 




We went back at around 4.30PM. We were all so exhausted, but in good spirits. Luckily we had a tent, so we just changed our outfit in it. Tak yah bilas la, ye dak? Save time baa.

PS, Another thing that bothered us was there was this other couple, who sat on a tree trunk like a Pontianak, eating kuaci (dried melon seeds), and simply threw the shells into the river. It was an excruciating eye-sore. Please lah people, don't do this, okay? Promise? Sayang!


From left : Me, Kak Rina, Zahira, Nurul.


Yours truly,
Non-adrenaline Junkie.

Friday, January 9, 2009

My Respond to Anonymous (because it doesn't fit the comment box).

I think I know who you are. 
Not brave enough to reveal yourself? 
Pathetic.  

1. I do know what I want and definitely know what I should do. What I want is not what YOU THINK I want. That's where you're wrong. Don't talk about things you don't know, sucker. Therefore, it's not called "cheating" as you so put it as I was actually showing my true "ugly colour". Plus, I never blamed the backstabbers for 'what happened'. I'm just pointing out their cruelty.  

2. I know what responsibility is and I definitely know where I stand. What I don't understand is how the backstabbers ASSUMED responsibility to be in charge. What the hell, who gives them the authority to be THE BOSS FROM HELL? As far as I'm concerned, it was supposed to be a teamwork, yet these oh-so-innocent backstabbers segregated work. Without consulting. Were they really the smartest above all? My memory tells me I have been the one acing above those three backstabbers throughout the semester (not to boast).  

3. Cosmetic is just cosmetic. Sweet talker is just sweet talker. There are fine lines between these two and being a hypocrite. I may wear a bit of makeup, but what does that have to do with people's perception towards me? The thicker the makeup, the more innocent I am? And what is sweet talker? Sweet talker is a thing for playboys and playgirls. I don't sweet talk. I TALK NICELY. I am not rude. Being hypocrites have nothing to do with wearing makeup or being nice. I never asked the backstabbers to do my work. I did my part in the end even if it was a bit late (which, in fact isn't actually late, even to the lecturer). You say the backstabbers kept it silent? If that were true, tomorrow would be Armageddon. They had problems with me, but whom should they discuss it with but me? They told everyone else but not me. Tell me how is that fair, how? If they really wanted to be friends with this "hmmmmm", they should've had a "heart-to-heart" talk with me saying I haven't been doing anything, to solve the problem. In reality, the problem started with those backstabbers.  

4. I never kept it silent. I think the backstabbers are SHALLOW DUMB enough to "reveal the truth" to others but to myself. It shows how lowly they are and how narrow-minded. Yes, IT IS QUITE A SHAME. (no pun intended).  

5. I know I will survive now and forever I will. I can live friendless if that's what the backstabbers were hoping for. The ones that are loyal to me will stay loyal because they are not people like the backstabbers. The backstabbers were competitive, and when they finally caught up with me and found they are not worthy to even be on my mind, they sabotaged me. The loyal ones are what you call real friends. They will never do my work so long as we do it together. I know they will have their own life later (hell, even now) and can't so "do my work". I never expect them to comb my hair for me, I never expect them to pull a baby out of my womb. I may not know exactly what kind of friends I'm searching for, what I do know is I do not ever want friends like those backstabbers.  

6. Being lucky may last forever. Fate shall last forever. It's the face that doesn't last forever, my dear Anonymous. But who doesn't have 'the face'? Everyone is beautiful so long as they know how to be (and I'm not talking about putting on makeups). I know what Allah has given me and I'm highly grateful beyond your wildest guess. You're saying I am not using my face "the right way"? Because I have an innocent expression pasted on me permanently? Ugly people (if there are any) can also have innocent expressions. So what, people really judge books by their covers nowadays? I, who stand with dignity, take in no such thing. So let me get this straight; just because I don't make dull, serious and intelligent expressions 24/7, I'm not using my face the right way? Right. 
I wasn't born with the face because I am lucky, love. I was born with the face because it's in my genes (no hard feelings).  

7. Oh the readers won't hate you, Anonymous. The readers might pity you, yes. For being so narrow-minded. This comment space is open for ANYTHING. That's why your comment is still there (and I request you yourself won't delete it once you've read mine). I'm nothing near ashamed of what you have said of me.  

8. Why on earth should I disclose the names of the backstabbers? Why on earth not? I don't intend to disgrace them, I don't intend to discriminate them. I'm merely realizing my situation. 
This my journal. I'm not about to use X, Y, Z or Anggerik, Melur, Orkid. 
Siapa makan cili, dia yang rasa pedas.  

9. I don't like it when people are hating each other. I am not George W. Bush. I don't create wars. I know my readers won't hate the people in the list a.k.a the backstabbers because my readers are mature readers and they can think for themselves. Why would they hate someone just because I do? Logically. Seriously. If you think they are susceptible, then you are sadly misguided. I still have friends who are friends with me, and they knew what had happened between me and the backstabbers, yet they maintained relationships with both sides. Did I protest? No.
Haven't you noticed? Do you have holes for eyes
You are single-minded to the point of recklessness.  

Yes, I am ashamed and I do regret for having to be associated with the backstabbers. But then again, they opened my eyes.  

It's normal for bitches to talk shit about others, but it takes a real bitch not to give a shit about it. 
Guess who's the real bitch?  

Curses come home to roost.  

Your English sucks. 
No wonder you didn't get an A.
This is my blog and I write whatever I want in it as I please. 
Go feed yourself some dignity. And English grammar, too, come to that.